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Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts

Thursday, 4 December 2008

Where There's a Quill

Where there‘s a quill and ink there lies a way,
To write poems with skill and flare, in peace.
Embrace the Pen within your hand, I say,
And let battles of words forever cease.
The verse that comes from white feathers today,
That talent is free but always on lease
So come rain or shine ink on paper lay,
With this treaty word command will increase.
A pen is a mighty warrior’s steel sword
Against the aggression of the blank page
To a poet as vital as the word
If used with the wisdom of Legend’s sage
Even if the flow is subtly absurd
And release your mind from the writer’s cage.


© Jem Farmer 2008, all rights reserved.

Ernie, the other half a bee

Half of me, co-incidentally,
As has been said, Eric be,
This half of bee must surely be,
acutely, the half bee that is me.

They forgot me, can you not see,
That Eric Bee was half of me,
They said this Bee was not a bee
And blamed it on an injury!

Sing it...

ABCDEFG
Ernie the half a bee
One, two, three... la dee dee
Ernie the half a bee

It's that cursed semi-bee
No chance he recalls me
As he dozes upon your knee
Damn that Eric, the half-a-bee

Ho, ho, ho, and he he he
Ernie the half a bee
Twiddly dum, fiddler's three
Ernie the half a bee

I loved the hive, 'til he broke free
Split in two, bi-sexually
That summer's day when he loved me
Wholly carnally.

He loved me carnally
I was his lady bee
The End



© Jem Farmer 2008, all rights reserved.

Tuesday, 28 October 2008

Kick back with a scotch bonnet

Endless hassle,
a gavel pounds against my brain.
Computers are whining, printers are drumming
the boss must have a hole in his head.
Back stabbing remarks heard behind doors,
just once let me get even.
He wants my ass, I know how to play,
so maybe today I should.
Let him think he’s got lucky, a grin that seduces
until he is eating out of my hand.
Bondage the game, with him in chains
wearing a Scotch bonnet on his wee head
as I kick back and relax
watching him sweat.


© Jem Farmer 2008, all rights reserved.

Sunday, 17 August 2008

Her Touch

In upright, proud posture I stand tall
I hear her open the door then feel clear air
As her fingers grasp me firmly, she wants my all.
The electricity surges from her touch, given with care.

Gently she pushes, rocking me back and forth,
I suck in harder as the air rushes in.
The longing builds inside me with each swath
As I move in all directions, my head in a spin.

The energy hums from deep inside my core,
Her hand engaging my attention, relieving my stress.
The silence as I rest, fulfilled once more.
The vacuum cleaning done, her carpets clean and fresh.

© Jem Farmer 2008, all rights reserved.

Word Bank: clean, engage, clear, posture, electric, push, rock, stress, rush, silence

POV: Vacuum cleaner